We've all been hearing about the terrible loss of life and destruction in Haiti this week. As a pampered Baby Boomer American, I can only imagine what it must be like there.
My petty concerns about whether five minutes' worth of music is going to tweak my vanity sufficiently seem particularly -- well, petty. I am grateful to have a solid roof over my head, as much food and water as I want, and top-level medical care at hand if I happen to need it. I live in a society that values civil order and that is set up to protect the public's peace and security. On top of that, I have the freedom and means to pursue my esoteric interests as much as I care to do so.
It so happens that even when there's no disaster calling attention to it, I actually think about these things every time I take a shower or shop at a grocery store. We are all very privileged here in the affluent parts of the world and should not lose sight of that.
Friday, January 15, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
What's so frustrating about this
I can hear how bad that recording from last weekend sounds, and I know that no matter what I do, I can't make the horns play the right notes, I can't keep the winds from playing sharp, and I can't do anything about a bass player coming in on a rest. I can ask the conductor to take my tempo, but he may or may not do so. It may sound better at the concert -- I hope so! -- but it may not. If I was playing this with the Boston Symphony with Seiji Ozawa conducting, even if I were not Yo Yo Ma, it would surely sound better.
I also can hear that I am not perfect, either, but the effect is synergistic. The piece starts too slow, so I can't control the bow as well. The winds blow a bunch of clams, so I lose my sense of the right pitch. And in the five minutes it takes to play it, by the time those things happen the piece is over.
This, in a nutshell, explains why I'm finding playing the piano more satisfying these days. One cello versus a whole orchestra is not a fair fight. Even though I'm not as good a pianist as I am a cellist, I have complete control over the results. The results may not be better, but that's another set of problems.
A friend of mine used to play in an amateur orchestra that regularly hired fairly big-name talent to solo with them. He said these people would come to the rehearsal and get this look on their faces: "Uh-oh, I practiced too much."
I also can hear that I am not perfect, either, but the effect is synergistic. The piece starts too slow, so I can't control the bow as well. The winds blow a bunch of clams, so I lose my sense of the right pitch. And in the five minutes it takes to play it, by the time those things happen the piece is over.
This, in a nutshell, explains why I'm finding playing the piano more satisfying these days. One cello versus a whole orchestra is not a fair fight. Even though I'm not as good a pianist as I am a cellist, I have complete control over the results. The results may not be better, but that's another set of problems.
A friend of mine used to play in an amateur orchestra that regularly hired fairly big-name talent to solo with them. He said these people would come to the rehearsal and get this look on their faces: "Uh-oh, I practiced too much."
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
What I'm playing this week
On the cello:
I'm trying to keep going with the Dvorak. The concert is now four days away, and I'm so looking forward to getting this off my plate. I hope I enjoy it at least a little bit. I'm uncomfortably indecisive about whether I'll play with the music or not. When I played it with the orchestra the last time (the recording I posted this past weekend), I played from memory. The question is whether the music would be better if I am reading or if I am playing from memory, and I'm not sure. (The fact that I'm not sure leads me to believe I should use music . . .)
The rest of the music for the concert isn't taking much preparation. I have decided that I won't play the overture, so I don't have to practice that. My solo is second on the program, and it would cause a lot of kerfuffle for me to squeeze off the "stage" (actually just the space between the first pew and the altar) after the overture and then back on. The physical space there is going to be a mess; the church is not willing to let us remove the first row of pews, so we're going to have to squash a Brahms-sized orchestra into a space that's never even big enough for a Mozart-sized one.
My cello is sounding a little sick. I think it's this horribly cold weather we've been having, and carrying it outside and in the car, that have perhaps caused the soundpost to shift a bit. I'm going to see if I can take it into the shop on Friday to have some adjustments made.
On the piano:
I signed up for a master class that will happen in February. I had intended to play Chopin Op. 55 No. 1, the F minor nocturne, but someone else already had dibs on that. Not wanting to play the same piece (really boring for everyone involved), I said I would play Brahms Op. 118 No. 1 instead. I don't know if this is the best choice. It's an odd piece: only two pages long, probably less than two minutes, it's full of swirling arpeggios and shifting key centers. It starts with a C7 arpeggio and ends in A major. It is more like a prelude than a full-blown stand-alone piece. But given my plan to learn the entire Op. 118, and given my difficulties with Brahms, I thought it might be helpful to work it up for this and to get some advice.
The teacher, Brian Ganz, is a pianist I met many years ago when I was a student at the University of Maryland. He had begun a performing career as a teenager, but at the time I knew him was taking some time off, accompanying student recitals while figuring out what he really wanted to do. His confusion was our gain -- he was a great accompanist and great to work with. He played on several of my recitals.
He now has a busy schedule of performing, teaching, and recording. The class I'm participating in is an activity of the Adult Music Student Forum, with which Brian has been involved in some advisory role for a while now.
Anyway, it will be a little strange to play for him as a pianist rather than as a cellist!
Just in case we somehow talk about how Op. 118 No. 1 leads into No. 2, I've also been looking at No. 2, the famous Intermezzo in A major.
I've also been touching on the current Bach prelude and fugue (WTCII in C minor), Gershwin prelude No. 1, and Chopin Op. 55 No. 1 as well as Beethoven Op. 2 No. 3.
I'm trying to keep going with the Dvorak. The concert is now four days away, and I'm so looking forward to getting this off my plate. I hope I enjoy it at least a little bit. I'm uncomfortably indecisive about whether I'll play with the music or not. When I played it with the orchestra the last time (the recording I posted this past weekend), I played from memory. The question is whether the music would be better if I am reading or if I am playing from memory, and I'm not sure. (The fact that I'm not sure leads me to believe I should use music . . .)
The rest of the music for the concert isn't taking much preparation. I have decided that I won't play the overture, so I don't have to practice that. My solo is second on the program, and it would cause a lot of kerfuffle for me to squeeze off the "stage" (actually just the space between the first pew and the altar) after the overture and then back on. The physical space there is going to be a mess; the church is not willing to let us remove the first row of pews, so we're going to have to squash a Brahms-sized orchestra into a space that's never even big enough for a Mozart-sized one.
My cello is sounding a little sick. I think it's this horribly cold weather we've been having, and carrying it outside and in the car, that have perhaps caused the soundpost to shift a bit. I'm going to see if I can take it into the shop on Friday to have some adjustments made.
On the piano:
I signed up for a master class that will happen in February. I had intended to play Chopin Op. 55 No. 1, the F minor nocturne, but someone else already had dibs on that. Not wanting to play the same piece (really boring for everyone involved), I said I would play Brahms Op. 118 No. 1 instead. I don't know if this is the best choice. It's an odd piece: only two pages long, probably less than two minutes, it's full of swirling arpeggios and shifting key centers. It starts with a C7 arpeggio and ends in A major. It is more like a prelude than a full-blown stand-alone piece. But given my plan to learn the entire Op. 118, and given my difficulties with Brahms, I thought it might be helpful to work it up for this and to get some advice.
The teacher, Brian Ganz, is a pianist I met many years ago when I was a student at the University of Maryland. He had begun a performing career as a teenager, but at the time I knew him was taking some time off, accompanying student recitals while figuring out what he really wanted to do. His confusion was our gain -- he was a great accompanist and great to work with. He played on several of my recitals.
He now has a busy schedule of performing, teaching, and recording. The class I'm participating in is an activity of the Adult Music Student Forum, with which Brian has been involved in some advisory role for a while now.
Anyway, it will be a little strange to play for him as a pianist rather than as a cellist!
Just in case we somehow talk about how Op. 118 No. 1 leads into No. 2, I've also been looking at No. 2, the famous Intermezzo in A major.
I've also been touching on the current Bach prelude and fugue (WTCII in C minor), Gershwin prelude No. 1, and Chopin Op. 55 No. 1 as well as Beethoven Op. 2 No. 3.
Saturday, January 9, 2010
Sausage making?
FWIW, here's a recording of today's reading of the Dvorak.
A few caveats:
Silent Woods test run
I'll add only that the orchestra needs a bit more practice . . .
A few caveats:
- The recording device was next to the cello section; I was next to the first violins on the other side of the conductor. The mics were pointing away from where I was sitting.
- I didn't do anything to this recording other than cut off the tuning and chit-chat at the beginning and the end.
- It was cold, it was the end of a 2 1/2 hour rehearsal, and I was hungry!
Silent Woods test run
I'll add only that the orchestra needs a bit more practice . . .
Avoidance or exhaustion?
I often find that as the time before a concert gets shorter, my tolerance for practicing for it gets shorter, too. This doesn't seem logical: why don't I want to practice more? In any case, I came home from work last night around 8:00, completely exhausted.
As my husband pointed out, I've been working really hard all week, going to work and then coming home and practicing until midnight or later. Even if this were purely for enjoyment it would still be tiring. Of course, if it's not for enjoyment, why am I doing it? As any dedicated musician knows, every moment of the process is not going to be enjoyable, and in fact many will be drudgery. But we have to press on. The times when I just threw up my hands and said the heck with this, I'm not going to practice, I've been sorry (mostly).
In any case, last night, I threw together some dinner (my husband was out with friends), read a magazine while lying flat on my back, and then dragged myself to my practice room. But then I just couldn't get the cello out. I finally sat down at the piano and practiced Brahms, Gerswhin, and Bach for about a half hour and then called it a night. I was in bed and asleep by 11:00.
I woke up this morning feeling much better. Now off to orchestra rehearsal.
As my husband pointed out, I've been working really hard all week, going to work and then coming home and practicing until midnight or later. Even if this were purely for enjoyment it would still be tiring. Of course, if it's not for enjoyment, why am I doing it? As any dedicated musician knows, every moment of the process is not going to be enjoyable, and in fact many will be drudgery. But we have to press on. The times when I just threw up my hands and said the heck with this, I'm not going to practice, I've been sorry (mostly).
In any case, last night, I threw together some dinner (my husband was out with friends), read a magazine while lying flat on my back, and then dragged myself to my practice room. But then I just couldn't get the cello out. I finally sat down at the piano and practiced Brahms, Gerswhin, and Bach for about a half hour and then called it a night. I was in bed and asleep by 11:00.
I woke up this morning feeling much better. Now off to orchestra rehearsal.
Tuesday, January 5, 2010
What I'm playing this week
On the cello:
Dvorak, "Silent Woods": continuing to work on this on all aspects:
Brahms Symphony No. 2: This actually sounded fairly decent at the rehearsal. The conductor was able to find some additional strings, so there should be 10 firsts, 8 seconds, 10 violas, 7 cellos, and I think 3 basses. The big problem will be fitting into the space at the church. We have not yet been able to get permission to remove the first row or two of pews (not usually an issue because they are only bolted down and can easily be taken out and put back in, but the powers that be are not willing to let us move them).
On the piano:
Chopin Nocturne Op. 55 No. 1: I have the go-ahead to submit a recording of this for the ABF e-cital on March 1 in honor of Chopin's 200th birthday. The idea for this recital was to include works other than the preludes, nocturnes, mazurkas, and waltzes; however, a few of the preludes and nocturnes did not make it onto previous recitals, so the people putting this together said it would be okay if I played this one. I learned it three years ago and made a decent recording, but I'm going to relearn and rerecord it. I'm curious to find out how this will go, and if I can do a better job this time.
Recording from 2007:
Chopin Nocturne Op. 55 No. 1
Bach, Prelude and Fugue in C minor, WTCII: This is improving every week. A friend came over for dinner this past weekend, and she arrived while I was practicing so my husband brought her downstairs to show her the piano. Since she was already in the room, I played the prelude for her, and it went very well (used the music, though).
Gershwin preludes: slowly improving.
Beethoven Sonata Op. 2 No. 3: I decided to try to learn this for yet another online recital scheduled for December 2010 in honor of Beethoven's 240th birthday. The reason I chose this piece is because I started learning it when I took lessons for a short time from my first teacher's teacher when I was a freshman in college. I always felt like it was unfinished business. It's not so terribly difficult, yet it is interesting musically, particularly for the way Beethoven tweaked the sonata form, and I thought it would be a good exercise in learning something longer (four rather long movements). So we'll see how this one goes.
Brahms Op. 118: I have done very little with this in the past week; will try to at least touch on it in the coming week.
Dvorak, "Silent Woods": continuing to work on this on all aspects:
- security (intonation, shifts, fingerings, bowings)
- tempo and rhythm
- sound
- mood
Brahms Symphony No. 2: This actually sounded fairly decent at the rehearsal. The conductor was able to find some additional strings, so there should be 10 firsts, 8 seconds, 10 violas, 7 cellos, and I think 3 basses. The big problem will be fitting into the space at the church. We have not yet been able to get permission to remove the first row or two of pews (not usually an issue because they are only bolted down and can easily be taken out and put back in, but the powers that be are not willing to let us move them).
On the piano:
Chopin Nocturne Op. 55 No. 1: I have the go-ahead to submit a recording of this for the ABF e-cital on March 1 in honor of Chopin's 200th birthday. The idea for this recital was to include works other than the preludes, nocturnes, mazurkas, and waltzes; however, a few of the preludes and nocturnes did not make it onto previous recitals, so the people putting this together said it would be okay if I played this one. I learned it three years ago and made a decent recording, but I'm going to relearn and rerecord it. I'm curious to find out how this will go, and if I can do a better job this time.
Recording from 2007:
Chopin Nocturne Op. 55 No. 1
Bach, Prelude and Fugue in C minor, WTCII: This is improving every week. A friend came over for dinner this past weekend, and she arrived while I was practicing so my husband brought her downstairs to show her the piano. Since she was already in the room, I played the prelude for her, and it went very well (used the music, though).
Gershwin preludes: slowly improving.
Beethoven Sonata Op. 2 No. 3: I decided to try to learn this for yet another online recital scheduled for December 2010 in honor of Beethoven's 240th birthday. The reason I chose this piece is because I started learning it when I took lessons for a short time from my first teacher's teacher when I was a freshman in college. I always felt like it was unfinished business. It's not so terribly difficult, yet it is interesting musically, particularly for the way Beethoven tweaked the sonata form, and I thought it would be a good exercise in learning something longer (four rather long movements). So we'll see how this one goes.
Brahms Op. 118: I have done very little with this in the past week; will try to at least touch on it in the coming week.
Saturday, January 2, 2010
First Dvorak rehearsal
I finally played through the Dvorak with the orchestra today, and it went well. All my practicing seems to have paid off. If I do a reasonable amount between now and the concert in two weeks I should be okay. I was going to record it but forgot to pack up the recording device before it was time to leave the house so it will probably have to wait until next week (the rehearsal tomorrow is strings only).
As usual, now that the first hurdle is done, I'm already forgetting the pain of preparation. Is there any way to avoid this angst, or does it have to be part of the experience? It seems the only musicians who don't go through this are those who are blissfully ignorant of how they really sound. Self-criticism goes hand in hand with improvement. The difficulty is not criticizing all the joy out of playing.
As usual, now that the first hurdle is done, I'm already forgetting the pain of preparation. Is there any way to avoid this angst, or does it have to be part of the experience? It seems the only musicians who don't go through this are those who are blissfully ignorant of how they really sound. Self-criticism goes hand in hand with improvement. The difficulty is not criticizing all the joy out of playing.
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